Gems from Social Media!!!!!

Smart answer by a female... On a flight, a guy asked a beautiful lady sitting next to him... 'Nice perfume.....which one is it?... I want to gift it to my wife..!!' Lady 'Don't give her....some idiot will find an excuse to talk to her..!!' ____________________________________________________________ A letter from a teacher to a parent:  Dear Parent,  Kumar doesn't smell nice in class. Please try to bath him. Parent's answer: Dear Teacher, Kumar is not a rose, Don't smell him,Teach him......   ____________________________________________________________ Mother to Son:  Who is Aziz Sultan ? Son : Don't know  Mother : Sometime give attention to study also Son to Mother : Do you know Chinky Aunty ? Mother : Don't know Son: Sometimes give attention to Dad also  ____________________________________________________________ A cute excuse: Teacher- why are you late? Student- Mom...

சம்மணம் என்றால் என்னவென்று தெரியுமா? *சங்கடங்களை போக்க சம்மணமிடுங்கள்*... நாம் பொதுவாக எப்பொழுதும் காலை தொங்கவைத்து அதிகமாக அமர்ந்திருக்கிறோம்... இரண்டு சக்கர  வாகனத்தில் பயணிக்கும் பொழுது, பேரூந்தில், இரயில் வண்டிகளில், சினிமா தியேட்டரில், பள்ளிகளில், அலுவலகங்களில், வீடுகளில், சோபாக்களில்,  கட்டில், நாற்காலி இப்படி நன்றாக யோசித்துப் பார்த்தால் நாம் அதிகநேரமாக காலைத் தொங்க வைத்துக்கொண்டே இருக்கிறோம். *இப்படிக்  காலைத் தொங்கவைத்து அமர்வதால் நமக்குப் பல உடல் உபாதைகள் உருவாகிறது*... இதற்குக் காரணம் என்னவென்றால் காலைத் தொங்கவைத்து  அமரும்பொழுது, நமது உடலில் இரத்த ஓட்டம் இடுப்பிற்குக் கீழ்ப்பகுதியில் மட்டுமே அதிகமாக செல்கிறது... *நாம் காலை மடக்கி சம்மணம் போட்டு  அமரும்பொழுது இடுப்புக்கு மேலே இரத்த ஒட்டம் அதிகமாகவும் வருவதற்கு வாய்ப்பு உள்ளது*. *நமது உடலில் இடுப்புக்கு கீழே உள்ள கால்களுக்கு நடக்கும்பொழுது மட்டும் இரத்த ஓட்டம் சென்றால் போதும்*. *மிக முக்கியமான உறுப்புகளாகிய சிறுநீரகம், கணையம், நுரையீரல், மூளை, கண், காது  ஆ...

Once a Great Saint visited a King.  The king in an attempt to mock idol worship told Swamiji,  "I've no faith in idol worship. How can one worship stone, wood and metal? I believe people are in illusion and just wasting time!".  Swamiji smiled.  He asked the king's assistant to take down the picture of the king that was hanging on the wall.  Although confused, the assistant did so.  Then Swamiji ordered him, "Spit on the picture!".  The assistant was shocked and looked at both of them. Swami repeated again and again, becoming more stern each time. The king was growing angry and the assistant started trembling.  Finally, he cried out, "How can I spit on this? This picture is of our beloved and respected king!".  Swamiji then told him, "The king is sitting in front of you in person. This picture is merely a paper - it does not speak, hear, think or move. But still you did not spit because you see a shadow of your king in i...

Many are aware and visit the Navagraha temples around Kumbakonam area in Thanjavur. However many are not aware that apart from the nine Shiva temples, there is also the Vaishnava Navagraha Kshetras, a set of nine Vishnu temples in and around Kumbakonam corresponding to the Navagraha. In all these temples Lord Vishnu itself is worshiped to get relief from the Graha Doshas. Surya: Sarangapani Perumal in Kumbakonam. Lord married Lakshmi as Komalavalli and is seen with bow Sarnga. Significance considered second only to Srirangam Ranganatha. Chandra: Jagannatha Perumal in Nathankoil or Nandipura Vinnagaram near Pazhaiyarai. Chandra and Nandi worshiped Lord here. Sevvai or Mangal: Srinivasa Perumal in Nachiarkoil. Lakshmi married Lord as Vanjulavalli Nachiar. All Vyuha forms of Lord are seen in sanctum. Budhan: Valvil Raama in Pullamboothangudi near Swamimalai. Reclining Raama. Lord performed last rites of Jatayu here. Guru: Andalakkum Aiyan in Adhanur near Swamimal...

. *Wife casually calls husband at office one afternoon* Wife : Hi, how are you...?_ Husband: I m fine...! Wife : What did you have for lunch today? Husband : Dont you hav anything else to ask?? You hav only silly questions like wat did You eat ... wat dress u r wearing... whom did u meet.... wat song did u listen etc etc...!! Wife: Oh!....!!! Ok Ok, then tell me, how should RBI fight these inflationary trends with minimum intervention in the Money Markets? And what should be the role of Finance Ministry to regulate inward Foreign remittances...??? Husband : (after few seconds silence).... I had curd rice with pickle and Salad .....!!!! _____________________________________________________________________ Friend1:How do you manage to look calm& relaxed? Friend2:This is because I always follow instructions from Veda strictly to avoid  tension in life Friend1:There are four Vedas.Which one do you follow? Friend2:”Veda”is my wife ...